LISBON BY BIKE 

If you want to put your life on the line and balance on a two-wheeled razor’s edge in a foreign city, then you should take a six hour eBike tour around Lisbon.  It was batshit crazy.

We started down at the Tagus River and then went up, up, up.  I’m sure you think you have ridden a bike up a steep hill — I rode twice across the United States — but I never encountered anything like many of the streets of Lisbon.  I’m talking straight up and down.  The e-bikes worked great, but going downhill was super scary. The polished, smooth limestone cobbled streets were slick even though it hadn’t rained. The turns were hairpin tight. The road width was high and tight with on-street parking; it was relentlessly crowded and chaotic, and the intersections were like joining the circus.  Toward the end of our ride, we entered a busy intersection where a red-bannered army of communist protestors was creating happy bedlam.  And there wasn’t a single minute when I didn’t expect to crash. 

The fact that our attentive guide, Rafael, kept us safe for hours as we did a giant, 10-mile loop around the city center was indeed a miracle.  He told us at the end that some of his past clients hadn’t been so lucky. I don’t think he was kidding.

To be honest, I remember very little about our crazy ride.  It was more a matter of safely covering ground than learning about the captivating city. 

Apparently, we visited the most important spots in Lisbon — the churches, plazas, eateries, shopping areas, vistas, monuments, the old and the new — but Inna and I mostly concentrated on just staying alive.

According to the brochure we passed by: Praça do Comércio, Alfama, Santo Estevão, Panteão Nacional, Mosteiro de São Vicente, Costa do Castelo, Chão do Loureiro, Santa Cruz, Castelo, Palácio de Belmonte, Largo Menino de Deus, Miradouro da Graça, Nossa Senhora do Monte, Mouraria Martim Moniz, Largo de São Domingos, Estação do Rossio, Rua do Carmos Chiado, Bairro Alto, São Pedro de Alcântara, Santa Catarina, Adamastor, Bica, São Paulo, Cais do Sodré, Ribeira das Naus, Praça do Comércio.

I was left with a handful of blurry impressions and a few snippets of fun facts from our friendly guide Raffa.

Graffiti has woven itself into the fabric of everyday life in Lisbon. We encountered the psychedelic tagging in both rich and poor areas.  It reminded me a lot of Athens and Melbourne, and I found it ugly and disrespectful of others’ property. Numerous scientific studies have concluded that it sends a not-so-subtle message that no one gives a shit about the places tagged. That said, we encountered the standard justification — dare I say adulation — for this popular universal pastime from numerous Lisboetas. “It’s art, ” they crooned. But I don’t think the people who spout this nonsense really mean it; rather, they are just trying to paint a smiley face on an intractable problem.

According to our guide, there are seven hills and three distinct levels spreading across the Lisbon mountain, each crowned with a primary structure.  Level one has the castle.  Level two has a spectacular viewpoint known as Miradouro da Graça. And the Lady of the Hill is the highest point in the city, where there’s a goofy Madonna statue in a plexiglass case.

There are lots of Sycamore and Jacaranda trees throughout the city, which reminded me of my home in Maryland and my winter quarters in Southwest Florida. Flowers were in bloom everywhere, and the air had a sweet honeysuckle aroma. It was like walking through a botanical garden city.

Lisbon’s architecture is outstanding, but most of the buildings were pretty rundown and in need of repair. The facades were slowly crumbling away.  No one seemed to notice or care very much. It definitely had that laid-back, lived-in feel.

Portugal is noted for its eye-catching tile buildings, characterized by their iconic azulejos, the defining feature of the country’s architectural landscape. These ceramic tiles serve both aesthetic and functional purposes, protecting facades from the salty Atlantic air and regulating indoor temperatures. These buildings use repeating geometric or floral patterns from the 19th century.  Large-scale blue-and-white (cobalt) scenes are often found on churches and train stations, depicting historical or religious events. Essentially, the buildings often tell a story.

The biggest story these days is that the locals, especially the young folks, are being priced out of town.   A small apartment in the old part of town — one small room (500 sf) — will run you $400,000.  The Portuguese economy ain’t great — like most of Europe, the national debt is a steady drag on the economy. But unlike the U.S., Portugal has actually reduced its debt. Over the last ten years, Portugal has reduced its national debt by approximately 35 to 60 percentage points relative to its Gross Domestic Product (GDP). During the pandemic peak in 2020, public debt sat at roughly 134% of GDP. Thanks to strong economic growth and disciplined fiscal policies, this ratio dropped to approximately 89.7% of GDP.

The financial situation remains an uphill battle. Foreclosures are running rampant, leading to gentrification as people from abroad (China) buy renovated buildings converted into Airbnbs.  It’s a vicious and alarming cycle for the natives, and one that is playing out in every nice city throughout the world. Homelessness is becoming a big problem.

Exploring a city by bike is our favorite way to learn about what makes a place tick. But we quickly realized the old part of Lisbon is too Medieval to accommodate bikes safely. It was designed for pedestrians and barnyard animals, and there’s an accident waiting to happen around every corner. The newer parts of town are a different story. There are green, two-way bike lanes that are heavily used, but reasonably safe.  And the trails along the river are wide and wonderful. Cycling is obviously a high priority for the powers that be, given the overwhelming traffic congestion. There’s a widespread city bike program where you can rent an e-bike by the hour.  The local favorite is the GIRA bike, and Lime is also quite popular.  Stand-up scooters are everywhere.  And it’s a healthy mix of chaos. But Lisbon is Barcelona-crowded — and we were there in the offseason. So, I would think long and hard about biking unless you are a fearless and seasoned urban cyclist. 

The good news is that Lisbon has a great and inexpensive public transportation system.  They have an excellent trolley, Metro, and train network. It’s easy to get around town and well beyond. Virtually every town in Portugal is accessible by train or bus.

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the ubiquitous tuk-tuks of Lisbon. Everyone said we needed to take one. The guidebooks endlessly hype this unique experience.

While the term “tuk-tuk” and the vehicle’s popularity are deeply tied to Southeast Asia (especially Thailand), they are a relatively recent phenomenon in Lisbon.  Tuk-tuks first appeared in Lisbon around 2012.

They weren’t introduced because of cultural ties to Asia, but because they are the perfect vehicle for Lisbon’s narrow streets. Historic districts like Alfama have alleys so tight that tour buses and modern cars cannot pass. Lisbon’s “Seven Hills” are physically taxing to walk; tuk-tuks act as a transport shortcut for out-of-shape tourists wanting to reach the high-altitude viewpoints.

They are primarily used for private sightseeing tours rather than standard point-to-point taxi service. Most of them are open-air vehicles with a roof and often come with removable rain shields and blankets for colder or wet weather.  Most standard tuk-tuks seat up to 4 passengers, though larger versions can accommodate 6 to 8 people. 

While they originally used noisy gasoline engines, approximately 70% of the fleet is now electric, reducing noise and air pollution in the historic districts. 

They are often brightly decorated and sometimes designed to look like vintage cars. Common colors include white and blue stripes, often inspired by Portuguese tiles or folk traditions. The ride is often bouncy and exhilarating due to Lisbon’s steep, cobblestone streets.

Drivers are typically English-speaking and act as local guides, sharing historical facts and personal stories as you ride.  Tours generally range from 1 to 4 hours, with full-day options also available. 

Rates are typically time-based rather than distance-based. You can expect to pay around $120 for an hour or $175 for 1.5-2 hours, though prices vary by company and should be agreed upon before departure. We found that it was prohibitively expensive, and the whole concept seemed kind of silly to us.

We chose to walk, or took Uber, which uses the same app as in the States and is absurdly cheap.  The black & turquoise cabs tend to be way more expensive.

On a final note, tipping after a meal is around 6% and is optional; servers must ask for it to be added to the bill.  They always seemed very grateful when we said yes.

In our travels around the globe, we have often heard that the two main reasons people like Americans are that we tend to be pretty friendly and we tip.  So, please do your part to keep America great when visiting Portugal, and always tip your server with a big smile.

I caught a lot of grief on Facebook from some locals and expats about that last bit, telling me that tipping was going to be the ruination of Portugal. The following post pretty much sums up this line of thinking. “Actually, Portuguese people hate tipping culture and hope it doesn’t take root in their country. That’s why you see pretty much no tipping in true local restaurants.”

I know there are countries, like Japan, where tipping is seriously frowned upon. And I am aware that in Europe, waiters don’t rely on tips because they are paid a living wage. But we tipped our server at every restaurant we ate at, and every time, they nodded and gave us a big smile. No one ever seemed offended. No one refused our tip. We rewarded good service, and our servers were undoubtedly happy to put a few extra euros in their pockets. I am always skeptical when someone says someone else doesn’t want more money. Plus, there’s a financial incentive not to tip if you aren’t in the service industry.

To tip or not to tip, that is the question. Everyone has their own opinion. But I will leave you with this startling fact: In Lisbon, the average weekly salary is approximately $510 to $570 USD before taxes, based on a gross monthly average of around $2,580. After taxes and social security, the typical worker takes home roughly $350 to $390 USD per week.