My home town of Annapolis, Maryland got hit with almost a foot of heavy/icy snow on the second day of the new year. No one saw it coming. And it had been well over a year since we got such a wintry load.
In truth, I would have waited until spring before venturing outside in that freezing crap. But all of our bushes and trees were bent forlornly downward as if trying to return to the ground from whence they came. It was a disaster in the making and several large pine branches had already snapped from the weight.
I detest snow and all things cold, and was planning on heading south to warm and sunny Florida on January 10th, and not returning until May. So, it’s all good, and I can start hating 2022 right out of the gate.
In order to go outside and beat the bushes, I donned more clothes than I have worn in over a year, other than when I sported my kilt ensemble to a wedding this past summer in Asbury Park, New Jersey. And I hate long pants and heavy winter clothing as much as I despise the whole winter wonderland fiasco.
It doesn’t make me a bad person, or even crazy. I’m just a hula boy.
But I did notice that a big snow storm will weed out all the guys with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD).
They are the ones who start relentlessly shoveling at first light. After clearing their driveways, cars, and walks of snow, they immediately have to drive somewhere. Anywhere. And they will shovel the street if they have to in order to escape.
They are like scouts out on recon. When they return, they walk around the neighborhood heroically, giving everyone a progress report on what streets have been plowed and which ones haven’t.
The jail-breakers are not bad people, and they probably aren’t all that crazy. They just can’t sit still and they hate being hemmed in.
After saving our bushes and trees, I put on my shorts and settled in by the fire, reading a nice book. I was done for the year.
And I can promise you this: When the New Year rolls around this coming December, I will be long gone and sitting on the beach at Siesta Key before the ADD Boyz even think about breaking out their snow shovels.
